Wednesday 12 May 2010

A list

1. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired
2. A will is a dead giveaway
3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana
4. A backward poet writes inverse
5. In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes
6. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion
7. If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed
8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress
9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat miner
10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds
11. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine has fully recovered
12. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France resulted in Linoleum Blownapart
13. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it
14. Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under
15. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key
16. A calendar's days are numbered
17. A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine
18. A boiled egg is hard to beat
19. He had a photographic memory which was never developed
20. A plateau is a high form of flattery
21. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large
22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end
23. When you've seen one shopping centre you've seen a mall
24. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine
25. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye
26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis
27. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses
28. Acupuncture: a jab well done
29. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet

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